Sunday, October 25, 2009

Some Quick Thoughts

Sunday Renewal.

For most of my life I have been restless. It has been the basis of my succes as an adult, that I was so driven to get better or get recognition or whatever, that I kept comingup with new challanges and new ways to improve myself. But this summer I finally slowed down for the first time in a long time. And it feels good. For the first time ideas to to me without having to look for them. Having just finished the third season of S1ngle and having to redefine who I am and what I am doing professionally (even though I may always end up changing nothing) this llness couldn't have come at a better time. I am even experiencing a LSD like sense of what it is that makes the universe tick. That feeling may be some sort of post-operative euphoria, but I know it is a feeling that I will not want to lose in the next few years and that more than anything I can think of will help me make my choices.

Still, I can feel it creeping back. With every new idea that pops into my head and want to type it out or phone someone to tell it. But I won't, because living in the happy now I am still experiencing is far better than projecting everything into the future and turning it into an obligation. Certainly this weekend my life is on hold. Although I feel (and can point out realisticly) that I have been getting much much better over the last week (only a week ago I had no balance, now I can do much more than I should or will), I still have to get confirmation that the tumor was indeed benign tomorrow afternoon (about in the morning in US time).

All that is to explain why I am putting up a post again. Not because I am totally declared better or that I am desperate... but I can't just do nothing.










3 comments:

Lysdexicuss said...

Hey Ger~ ! That euphoric, LSD type sensation is most likely a direct result of the increased OXYGEN your brain is recieving, due not only to the open surgery, but the wound as it heals will tend to 'breathe' more. To learn more about it, google 'trepanning', an ancient ritual that continues in a cult-like way even today. Great to hear you are re-inspired and willing to live in the moment, free of obligation. You are evolving, my friend !

Ger Apeldoorn said...

Thanks for that bit of information. I havr always been interested in these things, including theories about the brain and how dream works and how this relates to creativity, for instance in the works of Grant Morrison, Alan Moore and Rick Veitch.

Dylanio21 said...

I really enjoyed your blog today, even though I am reading it late.

Great comic post too!